I'm all caught up now

[IRonMaN]

Every year about this time I break into a cold sweat wondering how I am going to get all of these returns out by the April due date.  Thanks to my friends at ACME, I found the answer to my dreams.  I ordered it last week and it came today.  Now when client files start building up, I just toss them into my ACME Super Office Shredder and my problems just disappear.  For any clients asking how their return is coming that ended up in the shredder, I just convince them that they never brought it in.  Why didn't I invest in one of these years ago?  For anybody interested, I have some coupons you can use if you want to buy one for your office.

[itonewbie]

That must be what they call outside the box thinking!

[IRonMaN]

And when I'm done thinking I can shred that box too!

[abctax55]

Does it 'shred' snow ?  THAT's what I need help with right now, especially since I have until Oct 16th to complete all the tax returns.  Which would be just great except for the issue of cash flow :-).  Plus, those getting refunds are not inclined to wait.

[IRonMaN]

I'm sure with a couple of ACME adapters it could be converted to a snowblower.

[TaxGuyBill]

Oh, can I have a coupon to buy one?

Have you seen those secure drop off boxes that some people install outside of their offices?  The kind where your client can just put their items in that 24/7 to drop off with you?  I'm considering installing one of those, but putting a big shredder inside of it.

[IRonMaN]

That's a good plan.  Just make sure there is a delay in the shredder starting up so they don't hear it.

[itonewbie]

Didn't I see it in the ACME catalog that they have a model that comes in stealth mode?  Better still, the cost of instant delivery is included!

When your customers come, they won't notice that the shredder is there.  The stealth model works so well, even you'll forget you have it in the office.

I think that's the one Bill should consider.

[IRonMaN]

If he wants stealth he should steer away from ACME.  From what I understand the stealth team all transferred over from the rocket division.  As we all know, rockets were never ACME’s strength.🚀

[dascpa · Accepted solution]

For the first time in a while I laughed.  Thank you for relieving my grumpiness, as least for a moment or two.

[IRonMaN]

"Thank you for relieving my grumpiness, as least for a moment or two"

I didn't that that was possible, but I'm glad I was able to provide some temporary grumpiness relief 😀

[rcooley25]

More time for fireball drinking.

[IRonMaN]

You always seem to find time for that. 😁

[Frustrated-in-IL]

I don't need a coupon for a shredder.  I need a coupon for Fireball.  Because of the recent run on all stores in IL by a certain tax preparer, those few remaining stores with Fireball have significantly raised their prices.  I won't call those stores out by name because the certain tax preparer I am referring to will buy their remaining inventory and I will be parched for the next month.

[IRonMaN]

I always thought your name referred to frustration with Intuit, now I realize it is due to the Fireball situation in IL.

[rcooley25]

I am frustrated with Intuit. That is why I drink Fireball in order to forget.

[IRonMaN]

But lighten up a little.  It sounds like the rest of the folks in IL are going to have to switch over to moonshine because of your Fireball usage.

[rcooley25]

That is their problem. After all, first come first served.

[IRonMaN]

I just hope if you have decided to be cremated when you die that you have left plenty of notes for everyone to stand back once they light that fire.  I'm thinking with all of that Fireball absorbed by you, you are going to burn fast and hot 🔥

[rcooley25]

What is the problem with your files? All you have to do is put them in this large cardboard box and set them in the garage right behind your corvette.

[IRonMaN]

But I don't have a Corvette.  Can I put the box behind my Yugo?

[Frustrated-in-IL]

I don't have a Corvette.  I lost my tax girlfriend.  Some savvy tax preparer bought up all the Fireball within 500 miles.  That is why I am frustrated in IL.

Oh well, at least I have a shredder!

[IRonMaN]

As long as you have a shredder, who could ask for anything more?😁

[Frustrated-in-IL]

Well, the tax girlfriend was nice.  She was low maintenance.  The shredder constantly needs oil.

[IRonMaN]

It's just looking for a little attention.

[itonewbie]

"Can I put the box behind my Yugo?"

@IRonMaN Is your Yugo in puce?

[IRonMaN]

Do you mean they sold it in colors other than puce? 😳

[The_AntiTax_Man]

Ok. I need to get rid of about 50 banker boxes solid full of paper.  What would be the quickest, most economical way to permanently dispose of this material?  I need someone who can relate first-hand experience with a solution that worked well.  

I have occasionally encountered shredding trucks parked in the local bank parking lot.  Can these type of shredders chew up entire bankers boxes one at a time?

What works for you?

[dkh]

I've used the "shredding trucks" and was very pleased.   

They emptied my boxes into a large container (looks like a trash can), wheeled out to the truck in my driveway, container is emptied into the truck and immediately shredded.  There is a camera view of the process.  I could see my papers drop in and shred.  

[IRonMaN]

The shredding truck visits us every 3 months -  it works well.