As long as I'm here, we might as well celebrate 3/17 once again (and to make @joshuabarksatlcs happy):

One night, Mrs McMillen answers the door to see her husband’s best friend, Paddy, standing on the doorstep.

“Hello Paddy, where is my husband? He went with you to the beer factory.”

Paddy shakes his head. “Ah, Mrs McMillen, there was a terrible accident at the beer factory, your husband fell into a vat of Guinness and drowned.”

Mrs McMillen starts crying. “Oh don’t tell me that, did he at least go quickly?”

Paddy shakes his head. “Not really – he got out three times to pee!”