Sesame Street is having trouble determining per-alphabet-letter charges since Big Bird pointed out that Q now carries a lot more baggage and should cost more.  Oscar the Grouch, who does tax returns on the side, thinks that charging per letter is nonsense.  They're just like tax forms, you can put a lot of work into one and then very little work on the next one of the same type.  Some of them take no time at all, the software fills it out automatically. Bert and Ernie point out, however, that preparers should at least look at the form to make sure it's correct, but the fee for that shouldn't be based on time because the less experience you have the longer your gaze.  

Count von Count argues that the fee should not be based on forms and schedules, but on 1099's and 1098's, since most practitioners think this is a tax not on income but on pieces of paper that arrive in the mail.  He charges based on the size of the shoebox the client brings in, and whether they open the envelopes along the short or long edge.