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IRonMaN
Level 15
May 6, 2022
Solved

It's Friday and time for a smile

  • May 6, 2022
  • 5 replies
  • 30 views

And once you are done reading this, you can go and find something that makes you smile.

****************

Ole and Lena went to a fair. Ole was fascinated by the airplanes and asked a pilot how much a ride would cost.
"$10 for 3 minutes," replied the pilot.
"That's too much," said Ole.
The pilot thought for a second and then said, "I'll make you a deal. If you and your wife ride for 3 minutes without uttering a sound, the ride will be free. But if you make a sound, you'll have to pay $10."
Ole and Lena agreed and went for a wild ride.
After they landed, the pilot said to Ole, "I want to congratulate you for not making a sound. You are a brave man."
"Maybe so," said Ole, "but I gotta tell ya, I almost screamed when my wife fell out."

***********

Lena once had two chickens. One of them got terribly sick. So she killed the other one to make soup to get the first one well again.

***********

Ole and Lena are getting older, and vun day dey vas out in the car and Ole sees the red lights flashing in the mirror. So he pulls over and the policeman says "Ole, vat the heck are you doing?"
"Vell," says Ole, "Lena and I vent over der to da supermarket and got some tings for our dinner, and now ve yust have to go over to da drugstore for our medicine."
"OLE!" says the policeman, "Lena fell out of your car four blocks back!!"
"Oh, tank God" said Ole, "It vas so quiet dat I thought I vas goin' deaf!"

***********

Lar's friend Ole stopped by for a visit one day. "How's it going vit your marriage, Ole? Is da honeymoon over yet?"
"Vell, da marriage is doing fine." said Ole. "And Lena she treats me yust like a Greek god."
"Dat's great," said Lars. "How do you get treated like a Greek God, Ole?"
"Vel, you see, Lars, every night da wife serves me a BURNT OFFERING!" replied Ole.

************

Lena decided that she and Ole needed a bit of culture so she purchased tickets to the ballet. That evening after watching the performance for about 30 minutes Ole leaned over to Lena and whispered in her ear, "I don't see vhy dey dance on their toes. Vhy don't dey yust get taller dancers?"

************

Lena greeted Ole at the door of their apartment when he came home from work. "Guess vhat," said Lena. "Remember ve have been talking about getting a more expensive apartment?"
"Ya," said Ole. "Vhat about it?"
"Vell," said Lena, "now ve don't have to look. Da landlord yust raised da rent!"

This topic has been closed for replies.
Best answer by dkh

 TGIF

5 replies

dkh
dkhAnswer
Level 15
May 6, 2022

 TGIF

IRonMaN
IRonMaNAuthor
Level 15
May 6, 2022

Looks like you are "all smiles" this morning.  Either that or the person taking your picture had an unusual angle when they snapped the shot.

Slava Ukraini!
dascpa
Level 11
May 6, 2022

Two little boys were sitting in the back row of a wedding.  One turned to the other and asked, how many wives can you have.  The other boy said 16.  Four better, four worse, four richer and four poorer.

IRonMaN
IRonMaNAuthor
Level 15
May 6, 2022

I think that is 17, but I'm not very good with numbers.

Slava Ukraini!
JRC
Level 7
May 6, 2022

I'm sorry but I do not read posts greater than one paragraph.

Reminds me too much of homework and puts me to sleep..... 🙂
🙂

 

IRonMaN
IRonMaNAuthor
Level 15
May 6, 2022

I don't either, but they really aren't paragraphs if you put *********** in between them.  At least that's the rule I am going by and since it is my post, I get to use my rules 😜

Slava Ukraini!
GodFather
Intuit Community Champion
May 6, 2022

@IRonMaN 

Is this something we'll continue to see right up until the new tax season?  If so, I'm hoping that the new tax season comes quickly.  

IRonMaN
IRonMaNAuthor
Level 15
May 6, 2022

To be safe, just close your eyes until then 😟

Slava Ukraini!
joshuabarksatlcs
Level 9
May 6, 2022

To be safe, just close your eyes until then.

 

But I do close my eyes when I work on taxes.

Also, @IRonMaN  will you read my posts if I put ********** between (or even within) paragraphs?  

I come here for kudos and IRonMaN's jokes.
Level 7
May 7, 2022

I am going to my bottle of fireball whiskey

IRonMaN
IRonMaNAuthor
Level 15
May 7, 2022

Just be careful with that stuff or we are going to have to go back to doing welfare checks on you.

Slava Ukraini!
BobKamman
Level 15
May 7, 2022

@IRonMaN Don't worry about the welfare checks -- that's what he's using to buy the whiskey.